Lingam is the Sanskrit word for the male sexual organ and the translation of the word refers to a pillar of light. In Tantra the Lingam is honoured and respected as it is a channel for sexual energy and pleasure.
The lingam massage focuses on clearing energy, blockages and promoting healing, and the pleasure that is gained from it is purely a side effect of the massage.
Although the aim of the massage is not to achieve an orgasm, it is very common for a man to become highly aroused resulting in an orgasmic climax. The intense sexual pleasure will be felt throughout the whole body, not just around the genitals.
The massage should be relaxing, stimulating, erotic, healing, exhilarating, liberating and leave the receiver with a great sense of emotional, mental, spiritual and physical well-being whilst experiencing a sensual arousal and high levels of sexual pleasure.
It is essential that the giver and receiver are both fully relaxed and that their intentions are set for the same purpose, so that the massage is not confused with being to purely receive sexual gratification. The energy between both people should be flowing freely so that the energies can intertwine, synchronise and harmonise rhythmically.
The massage focuses on removing blockages that are caused by a build up of toxins and when these are removed sexual, physical, emotional and spiritual health is vastly improved, as the energy (prana/life-force) is able to flow around and through the body.
The massage should be carried out in a calm and peacefully setting, with a comfortably warm temperature, a subdued lighting with candles and gentle tunes playing in the background so that the right ambiance is created.
To start the massage both partners should be sitting or standing face-to-face touching hands or looking into each other’s eyes. The breathing should be synchronised beginning with deep breaths that fill the lungs.
When the breathing techniques have energised the giver and receiver, the person receiving the massage should lie face down on the bed and when comfortable, a full body massage can begin. The massage should consist of small strokes along with firmer kneading pressure to disperse the energy and release any tension that is being held.
Working from the feet upwards, using both hands the giver should massage the whole of the legs, the inner thighs, pelvis and then move up to the buttocks, lower back and then onto the shoulders. A head and face massage can also take place, however, this depends on the receivers preferences.
Then, the person receiving the massage should turn to lie on his back with plenty of pillows propped under his head so that he is in a comfortable position and able to watch the front of his body being massaged along with his lingam. A cushion should be placed just under his hips to elevate the pelvis slightly.
It is important to make sure the breathing remains deep for both the giver and the receiver so that the connection remains and the energy continues to flow between the two.
Sexual energy is a powerful force and when it is harnessed it can induce high levels of emotional, physical, sensual and sexual pleasure.
The receiver should have his legs slightly apart with the knees bent, and again the massage should work its way up the body, starting with the feet, then the calf muscles, thighs, abdomen, chest and shoulders.
The lingam massage is a series of more than 25 different holds that build and release pressure that will feel similar to waves rising up and then crashing down (some powerfully, while others will be gentler and with less force). The energy will be building, dispersing and spreading over and throughout the whole of the body.
Once the receiver is fully relaxed the lingam massage can begin.
Prior to massaging the lingam it is essential to ask permission before touching it to pay respect and honour it as a sacred organ.
The giver should place a few drops of massage oil or lubricant onto the hands, warming it slightly between the fingers. Beginning at the very top of the thighs massage the lubricant into the skin moving upwards to where the top of the legs meet the crease of the pelvis.
Working on the muscles alternating between stroking and kneading. Apply a little pressure to loosen any tension by pressing in and then releasing slightly at the end of each movement.
With slow and slightly firm pressure begin to massage the lower part of the pelvic bone with the fingertips using small circular motions.
To further stimulate the blood flow to the lingam area, while still using the fingertips in small circular motions gently massage the area just slightly above the pelvic bone. It is at this stage that many men may feel a natural instinct to participate actively as the body will begin to feel aroused.
The profound feeling felt within the lingam massage is the process of allowing the body to accept the pleasure whilst remaining in total surrender, so the receiver will feel the sensations that occur when fighting the urge to respond.
Before the massage takes place ask the receiver whether they prefer the testicles to be stroked very gently or for a soft, but firmer, knead and pull to take place. Each person will have their own preferences, so it is always better to check to ensure maximum comfort.
Slowly begin to massage the perineum paying special attention to the “sacred spot” which is a small indentation halfway between the anus and testicles. In slow circular motions press gently and massage to fully relax this very sensitive area. This circular spot may feel tender and hold pain and tension so massage very carefully at first.
Massage downward from the base of the lingam to the anus, alternating between strokes, circular motions and a very soft and gentle pulling or tugging on the delicate skin.
Pay attention to the receiver to ensure they are fully comfortable, not in any pain and relaxed at all times.
Moving towards the testicles, very gently and slowly, use one hand to stroke and massage this area to loosen the scrotum sack, while using the other hand to firmly massage the pubic bone.
While massaging the oil into the skin pay close attention to the receiver to ensure they are fully comfortable, in no pain and also to ensure they are still breathing deeply—if necessary gently remind them to remain focusing on the breath throughout.
Rub a few more drops of oil into the hands then place one hand at the base of the lingam with a gentle but slightly firm pressure. Very slowly pull the hand up from the base to the head of the lingam with a very soft squeezing motion pulling slowly up and then releasing. Then using the other hand start at the base of the lingam and very slowly and gently massage the opposite way, stroking in a downward motion. Keep using alternative hands and very gently increase and decrease the pressure, using variations of speed while keeping a rhythm flowing.
The head of the lingam is a channel for sexual energy while making love and by applying pressure to it, the energy can be awakened and released. Massage the whole of the head with one oiled hand cupped around it and from the wrist use circular stroking movements. Wrap the other hand around the base of the lingam adding a small amount of pressure, however, if the receiver is nearing ejaculation, move this hand back to the perineum to place pressure there whilst slowing down the stroking motions at the head.
Allow a few drops of oil to drip from the head of the lingam down to the testicles and then complete a full stroking motion from the head down to the testicles and then upwards in the opposite direction. Then stroke from the testicles in downward strokes back down towards the anus.
Repeat all of the above motions building and releasing pressure, allowing energy to disperse and to encourage a complete relaxation of the overall genital area.
If at any time the receiver comes close to climax, just slowing down and placing pressure in the perineum area will release the desire to climax so the massage can continue. Another method that can slow down ejaculation is to gently squeeze the head of the lingam while the receiver focuses slowly on taking deep breaths.
A lingam massage is as much a spiritual and healing practice for the giver as it is for the receiver. It is essential that the attitude and mindset is of the correct intention so that the focus is purely on the sexually awakening aspects of it that influence the energy flow, rather than the concern being for sexual gratification or eroticism. Even though the massage will likely feel erotic and sexual, this is not the purpose of the massage.
The lingam massage will bring on a full sense of relaxation and liberation to the whole body and mind, surrendering to the mindful pleasure that is found in two people uniting to perform a ritual of giving and receiving.
Part of the pleasure for the male is found in the passive role that is played so that he is fully conscious and fully aware of each sensation that is taking place and is free to submerge fully into relaxation so that the body is highly sensitised and awakened to each movement that is taking place.
There is no shame at all to be found in this massage and it is very common for a male practitioner to massage another male or a female to massage a male with no sexual connection or energy being passed from one to the other. The massage focuses on the spiritual and healing aspects, however, it is also perfectly normal and natural for feelings of eroticism to take over the whole body, resulting in ejaculation. The body will likely shiver and pulsate as Kundalini energy is released with the receiver being elevated to a higher spiritual plane.
The receiver should remain resting in silence or for several minutes after the massage has taken place so that they can fully absorb every sensation their body is feeling and so that the mind and spirit also are awakened to every aspect of energy clearing, rejuvenation, healing and cleansing that has taken place.
The mind of both the giver and receiver at this stage will likely be at a very conscious and highly awakened level. The mind will be in a meditative state, which will allow the opportunity to feel completely in the present moment. Unprecedented emotions and sensations will be flushing through the minds and bodies, as the giver and receiver are both transcended into a heightened physically and mentally aware primal state.
Soft music should continue to play, or if your partner prefers, the room can be still in a peaceful silence.
The after effects of this deeply sensual and healing experience will be felt in deep and intense waves of sexual energy that will circulate the whole mind, body and soul, lasting for hours and very likely many days after the massage.
Is Pelvic muscle awaking necessary before Lingam massage?
The importance of Pelvic floor massage in men
Many Tantric practitioners start lingam massage without awaking of the pelvic floor muscles to help men with premature ejaculation. To have more effective result it is recommended to awake the pelvic floor muscle by massaging prior starting the lingam massage. While it might result in activation of Shame in the body sprit but some research show that awaking of floor muscle prior lingam massage provide a better outcome.
The other helpful thing is to invite men to have some exercise to awake the floor muscle; following is one that exercises which I found in http://malepelvicfloor.com: Though the joints within the pelvic girdle are designed more for stability than for movement, they do allow for subtle motion (large movements come from the hip joints and lumbar vertebrae). An exception to this is the coccyx or tail bone which normally has about 30 degrees of movement at its joint with the sacrum. Significantly, several of the pelvic floor muscles as well as some fibers of the Gluteus Maximus attach to the coccyx. Positions such as squatting or child’s pose in yoga can help to open up the pelvic floor. Lowering your perineum / pelvic floor gently onto a rolled up towel or mat, small soft ball, or other appropriate object and letting the pressure slowly stretch the muscles can be helpful. Care must be taken, especially for those in pain, not to overdo and thus aggravate your symptoms. Using full breaths to slowly, gently, and rhythmically ‘bulge’ the pelvic floor muscles downward and outward on the inhale can also help open this area up. You must be sure to let the breath do the stretching and resist any urge to assist by straining.